Scenario Entitled: Arrrr!

Characters:
Missy (NPC), a talkative, precocious little child-like D-Bee.
Gareth, a talkative, precocious giant child-like Human.  Strange, that.
Location: Freedom Way South
Date: It is Moon Day, Norand 23rd, 109 P.A.


        Gareth lumbers down the sidewalk from the north. He's chewing on a fat looking cigar that bears all the trappings of something not widely marketed. As he passes by an alleyway, he takes a moment to collect all the phelgmn and other tasty juices in his throat and cast them towards a sleeping figure further inside. "Laz'ah...bastich..." He rubs his nose, puffs and continues onwards.
        Missy mistakenly flicks a marble into the tromping man's path from the little corner created by the steps to The Hanged Man and its front wall, just a few feet from the walkway. She's got a whole horde of many-colored trinkets, arranged in oddly-shaped little groups. As her large eyes follow the path of the errant marble, her gaze is forced to travel up Gareth's legs, and up and up and up to his face. She gives a squeak.
        Gareth trods onwards all self important-like and manages to set his booted foot upon the small bauble. ~shhhhrrik!~ His foot shoots out behind him like he was trying to mule kick someone following him. Luckily, no one is actually behind him at the moment. His other leg jerks forward and overcompensates to try and keep him level. "Whuzza...Gaaaauuuwk!" He crashes to the ground in a vague and clumsy splits position like a rock performer of old. David could have used marbles on Goliath first. Thump.
        As the man crashes down on the walkway, scattering other morningtime pedestrians into a wide berth, Missy sits up and assumes a horrified pose, her hands flying up to cover her mouth. She looks with concern.. not at Gareth, but at her lime-colored marble flinging in an arc to the north, and coming down in the street somewhere up the block. Her open mouth crimps into an frown, and she slowly gets to her feet, and walks out towards Gareth, standing nearby and examining his painful-looking position on the ground with solemn interest.
        Gareth pants and his eyes swivel to the left and right to get an estimation of just how many people he looked like an ass in front of. Far too many. And of course there is that kid right there. Probably her fault. He looks her over, noting the freaky abberations that set her apart from your standard little snot-nosed kid. He grits his teeth and begins to process of rearranging his limbs into proper positions. "Whut'yew look'n at. Yew wee litt'le...Kid."
        Missy's green eyes widen, and gleam in the morning sun like pinwheels of fascination. "Say whatchamacallit, Mister..." She thinks about it for a second. "...Pirate?" She steps back nimble to avoid being footswept by the fellow as he regains his feet.
        Gareth drags his legs together and gets into a crouched position. He winces as he finishes his movements to get on his own two feet. "Whut?" He squints his good eye at her in some confusion and irritation. "I ain't gunn'ah say nuthin'r whut-chu-mah-call't...Piss'oof, yew. I shud eet'yew fer make'n me look like'ah bloody arse, S'truth."
        "What?" she echoes his own confusion, then straight away afterwards, she gives a furtively smiling gasp. He said Piss. He said Ass (but in a funny strange kind of way). She gives a nervous titter, and takes just one little step back, wings slowly flapping, impudently. She sticks her hands behind her back, and just eyes him with a faux-innocent expression.
        Gareth frowns and rolls his eyes. His kids will never be like this. No way. They'll be smart and respectful and stuff. At least she isn't mimicing and echoing him like those bloody little urchins on Drake. He begins dusting himself off and raising to his feet. "Yew a wee litt'le freak. Yew know tha? Wee litt'le girls tha look like yew shudn't 'ave wee wings." He mumbles, "Litt'le...dee-vils'r fairy cree-chures mebbe." That has him giving a more wary glance to the little girl.
        Missy seems to delight in his accent, enjoying twisting her small face into various expressions of puzzlement and incredulous 'you're so weird'ness, at each new pronunciation. She nods along with his last remark, unoffended. "Devils gots pointy teeth." She bares her own small tooth chips. "Faeries are small and fly!" She works her shoulderblades, flapping her wings uselessly. "I'm a Wee Little Monster," she announces happily, and turns a little to point towards the steps of the Hanged Man. "Want to see my marbles? Only if you promise not to kick any more of them," she adds quickly.
        Gareth shakes his head and rises up almost to his full height. He stoops his posture and smacks at his ass. "Aye...wee mons'tah, S'truth. Mebbe yew shud take them marbies'n play sumplace where big peep-le dunn'ah trip on'm. In fact..mebbe yew shud open yer yap'n swallow ev'rah litt'le marble like a gud gud wee little mons'tah. Then I kick'm like a big an'rah pirate." He raises his eyebrows while yapping the suggestion.
        So he -is- a pirate. She's so often corrected on her assumptions that she rarely expects to be right anymore. That fixes it. With a breathless look of awe, she backs away and jumps off of the sidewalk to protect her possessions, particularly herself. "Don't do that," she exclaims, "I'm only little, and you're a big mean bully pirate! Miss Rainbow will be mad," she adds with sudden inspiration. "Yes, she'll be mad and she'll put a curse on you and she won't tell your fortune and then you'll be sorry 'cause you won't be able to sail away without knowing." She grabs up a cloth marble bag, and begins to scoop her treasure into it as fast as she can grab up handfuls. "..and you'll beg and bag, but she won't tell you what you need to know, because she loves me and she HATES you!" she ends tearfully. Take that!
        Gareth gets a confused dumbass look on his face as he listens to Missy's reaction. He catches the gist of it though. Damn kids. Shouldn't they be making a living on the street or in school (for the wusses) and stuff like that. "Aye...gots'ah message fer Miss Rainbow...Gaaah!" He makes an evil face and waves his hands about in the air about his head. Just who is the immature one in this situation? He starts to stalk off, favoring his right leg and mumbling. "Bloody kids...Me bloody kids be smart'r...sail'n...S'truth." Maybe he'll find that little marble and peg it at her head later.
        Missy screams instantly at his outburst, and a peculiar smell of ozone becomes readily noticeable in the air. Her hair seems a bit frizzier than before, as she shrinks against the front of the building, dropping the handful of marbles she has. They bounce and clack off of each other upon hitting the ground, and half of them go rolling off onto the sidewalk again. As Gareth turns to go, little shocks of electricity can be felt as a couple of the baubles touch up against the side of his foot. Or not. Depending on the rubber content of his boots.
        Gareth has since jutted out his bottom lip for effect. The grumpy giant. When his foot gets jolted a few times he jerks his leg up. "Wauuh! wauuh!" He dances a little in place like a deranged maniac and looks down at the sidewalk. "Yew wee litt'le..." He fumes and flares his nostrils as he tries to back away from the spilling spheres. "If I git yew I eet yew'n yer Rainboo. Waaugh." Damn shocks.
        Missy's face dribbles with indignant tears, with little pops of static crackling the air around her. "You can't eat Miss Rainbow!" she shrills, shocked again into mouthing off. He should probably just stop talking. "Daddy loves her and he'll eat YOU up, if you do! Then he'll get all your treasure and your talking parrot and your ship, and he'll give your treasure to Miss Rainbow, and he'll give your talking parrot to me," ..wasn't they both already eaten in this little fantasy?.. "and he'll take your ship and fly away to find all his people! 'Cause his people are coming, and you can't stop them, and only they can save you!" Yowsas. Where'd all that come from?
        Gareth makes a ~yeah-right~ face to combat such threats from the little girl. He kicks a few of the marbles towards the alley. "Aye...Yew be watch'n yer wee litt'le girlie cartoonies too mooch, S'truth." He places his hands on his hips and strikes a pose of defiance. "Aye aye...'n tha pur'ple froggie be lead'n 'iz army'ah peep-le. Yer daddy kin kiss me arse, An if yew wanna still 'ave'm, yew bett'ah be more po-lite inn'ah future. If yew not, I git me...ship'n...parrot tah..." He shakes his head finally in exasperation. "...They eet yew too! Faah!" He starts to storm off.
        Gareth plays over her voice in his head after uttering such crazy things as pirate ships and birds eating little girls. Hmmm, that sounds awfully familiar, what she said that is. Having that dream for a month and a half tends to help you memorize things. He turns back and points a thick finger at her. "Whut yew talkie-talkie a-boot? Yew yap'n a-boot tha bloody dream! Spill yer beans, kiwi."
        Ani steps out onto the street from the mouth of an alley.
        Missy has gone back to stuffing her marble bag, and snivelling in that quiet, pitiable way that will come in handy when she finally tracks down someone who's supposed to care. Like Missus Rainbow. Then she'll let down the floodgates full-force. When she is confronted once again by Pirate Gareth, who's now standing closer to the entrance of the alley beside the shop, she pouts and shakes her head rapidly. "They're not beans, they're marbles!" she says with exasperation. "And the Happy Zany Purple Frog's not my Daddy!" Standing up with grit-covered knees, she trots up the steps to The Hanged Man's door. A few errant marbles are still scattered about the walkway.
        Gareth waves his hand towards the door Missy is stepping towards. "Aye aye...So yew say. Prolly big'n purple'n ug'lah too." He bends down and starts picking up some errant marbles near him. Maybe he can pitch them at her...if they don't do that thing again. His gloves are thick enough. He hopes. "Stoopid kid...I was tell'n ya ta ex-plain why yew said tha thing a-boot yer pop's peep-le an 'ow they'll save me poor wee caboose. Yew bett'ah tell me whut yew know'r I'll think yer...stink'ah'r sumpthin 'orrible." Soon he'll be eating paste and pulling pigtails. He's got to start speaking to an adult soon or get locked into a particular state.
        Ani steps out of the alley, a bag strapped across her shoulders, looking pretty much exausted. "Cripes..." She mutters softly, tilting her head to the side and wincing slightly as she feels a few pops. Fun 12 hour shifts. Boy...you'd think they'd take it easy on the new girl. She pauses as she reaches the sidewalk, sighing as she unlaces the front of her bodice, then pushes it down on her hips. Nudity not a problem, she is wearing her cut off jeans underneath, after all, to tired to realize quite the commotion going on.
        Missy sneers as much as her tear-streaked little face will allow such an unfriendly expression. That Gareth's always making the girls cry.. like Georgie Porgie, he is. "-You- stink! You're a big smelly pirate, and they won't save you!" she yells in her fluting little girl's voice. Pedestrians try to skirt around Gareth as they listen uncomfortably to the gist of their loud ...'conversation'.
        Ani blinks, gold eyes looking up as she quirks a brow, crouching down next to her bag as she puts her bodice inside of it, then straightens her sweater slightly as she stands up again. Oh jeez. "You've gotta be kidding me." She mutters quietly, looking down and pulling out her gloves, starting to make her way over to the two.
        Gareth rolls his eyes and shakes his head. "Aye aye...An yew a snott'ah kid tha cries'n cries'n cries like'ah...wee girlie. I dunn'ah need save'n from yer family. I be a big strong bloke'n stoof. Yew wee brat." He holds up a few of her discarded marbles in his hand and waves it about. "Got yer ballies...ye litt'le freak.  Who stinks now? S'truth!"
        The D-Bee child is outraged, forgetting that she's supposed to be running to find someone who'll feel sorry for her and validate her utter cuteness. "Give me back my marbles! They're mine!" she demands, clinging to the railing and leaning out to reach her hand towards him. As if he'd just hand them back. "And they're not -my- family, they're -Daddy's-!"
        "Gareth, what the hell are you doing?" Ani says as she finally gets her gloves on, pushing her bag back and stepping up between the two, though her dirty look is focused on the much larger man. She heard the last part....man...he took her marbles? What a jerk.
        Gareth turns his angry attention towards Ani. After the momentary suprise at her being her here right now, he yammers, "Tha wee litt'le mons'tah be trip'n me'n call'n me a stink'ah'n stoof." He points over towards Missy as if he needed to point out the source of his troubles. "She say'n weird stoof like whut wuz in tha bloody 'orrible dream awhile a-go. I keep'n 'er ballies...she ain't answer'n me a-boot who these bloody daddy peep-le be, S'truth." He mimics in a higher voice, "Me famil-ee! Me famil-ee."
        Missy straightens back at the appearance of Ani, and scrubs her eyes and cheeks with the sleeve of her sweater. Her large eyes move from the woman, up to the man, shrewdly discerning that the female may be an ally against this giant. "I didn't say anything about Daddy's people," she protests, stepping down to Ani's level and peering at her appealingly. "That bad Mister Pirate just wants more treasure!"
        "If you tripped, that means you weren't watching where you were going, you giant -oaf-." Ani replies sharply as she reaches up to pull his hand down, promptly snatching the marbles from him. "And for god's sake, she's a child, don't call her a monster. You want to have -kids-?" She shakes her head sighing as she looks at the marbles briefly before holding them out to Missy, "He always wants more, he doesn't need your treasure though, here honey. Were you playing with these in the street?"
        Gareth wags his finger at the little D-bee girl. His mouth works and gobbles for a moment before he makes sounds come out. "She bloody lie'n. She...Yew..." Minus his marbles, in more ways than one, he's flabbergasted at these two teaming up against him. He huffs. "Tha wee litt'le..brat said sumpthin 'bout 'er daddy'n 'iz peep-le not come'n tah save me. I dreamed 'bout sumpthin like tha a-while a-go, S'truth. She a wee litt'le lie'ah...Me kids not gunn'ah be like 'er, S'truth. They be 'ansome'n bea-tiful'n smart."
        Missy looks impressed. She grabs the few baubles from Ani's hand with a grinding clack of them coming together in a smaller fist, and loosens the gathers of her cloth bag to deposit them. "Nope nope, I was right here, where it was safe." She points over the side of the small stairway, where a corner of space between the walkway and the front wall of The Hanged Man would allow a little one such as her would be able to crouch. She looks past Ani back up to Gareth, frowning impudently. "I'm a wee little monster, and I am -too- han-some and bee-yootiful and smart. Missus Rainbow says so, and -she- knows fortunes. She knows your fortune," she taunts, "But you're not gonna hear it. Until you're nice." So she's not so much of an innocent little kid, after all.
        Ani quirks a brow at that, but none the less she can't help but smirk faintly as she steps back, folding her arms over her stomach as she looks up at Gareth. She won't reply for him, after all.
        Gareth throws up his hands. "Yew see? She be bloody imposs-eeble, S'truth." He sneers and glowers at the child. "Dunno who this Miss Rainboo be, but she must be deaf'n dumb'n...more dumb, S'truth. I bet I kin tell yer bloody for-chune. I eet yew rally soon'n yer marbles'n then I float a-way on me ship with me trea-shure, S'truth. I al-ready know me for-chune. I git rich'n fat'n rule tha bloody world, S'truth."
        Missy stares, and can't really figure out a way to be more bratty than -that-. The man takes the cake. As if in rebellion, her pale face goes still and serious. Her big green eyes glower solemnly as she lifts her free hand, bent at the elbow like a chicken wing, and pointing one nailless finger from chest level at Gareth. She says quietly, "You better sail away quick, Mister Pirate. You better hope and hope you can sail far far away before the no-noise nothing-space catches up with you and makes you nothing." She points and stares, falling silent.
        "What makes you think he's not already nothing?" Ani mutters under her breath before pushing Gareth back slightly. "Come on, mister macho man, you've already caused enough chaos. Why could you do this some place away from the restaurant so I wouldn't have to interfere?" She looks over at Missy. "Take care of those marbles, kiddo"
        Gareth closes his eyelids half-way and prepares to hear another long winded childish insult or threat coming his way. When that doesn't happen, he eyes her strangely. When she finishes her odd speech he furrows his brows and rasps to Ani as she attempts to get him the heck of here. "Yew see? She talkie-talkie rally strange." He raises his voice. "Aye aye, whatch't...I al-most think yew be on 'er side...Whut that 'ell be a no-noise noth'n-space. I didn't start nuthin...She tripped me bloody arse'n zapped me."
        Missy unblinkingly switches her gaze to Ani and pipes up in a more child-like voice, "I will, Miss... Fuschia. Thanks!" She blinks then, smiles brightly, then turns and trots back up to the door to the shop, pretending to not have heard Gareth's accusations. She's young and innocent.
        "Do you even know how to just move -on- instead of making a huge deal out of every little thing?" Ani snaps at Gareth as she jabs him in the chest.
        Gareth brushes at his chest to dislodge any poking or jabbing digits. "Aye aye..." He shakes his fist at the departing child like some angry villian from a B-movie. "She ain't gunn'ah live long if she causes stoof like this with just any bloke onn'ah street. Sum'o them might not be as nice as meself, S'truth." He turns his back to the Hanged Man and purses his lips. "Bloody wee brats...Me pop would'ah popped'r one."
        "Your -pop-? Hell, you hit me, I don't see why that wouldn't keep you from 'popping' a kid." Ani replies with some amount of bitterness and hostility as she wraps her arms around herself. Well...that was harsh...but he -did- hit her.
        Missy's ears perk at the news that the Ani-lady was bullied by the pirate too. She waits until they've both turned to go, before sticking the tip of her tongue out at the back of Gareth's head. She then pushes the door open, and runs on inside with a small giggle at getting away with such disrespect.
        Gareth actually considers this line of logic. Perhaps he should run back and terrorize the kid some more. After all, nothing makes you look big and tough like beating up a mere child. He broods. "Fah...Tha be differ'nt. B'sides, Kids'r a wee bit dense'n stoopid all tha time'n stoof, S'truth. It be ex-pected." He snorts and then rubs his nostrils. "Aye...whut yew be do'n 'oot 'ere anywho?"



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